Monday, January 11, 2010
Envy, jealousy, and just plain wanting what others have...
Oh its Monday again and boy has my mind been bombarded with all sorts of thoughts and feelings today. I can't seem to relax at all. I guess I am finally getting around to determining what my new year's resolutions will be and actually tackling my "need to fix it" list.
Tonight I picked up my Mom's January issue of Good Housekeeping. Normally when these arrive in the mail, I briefly skim through it and check out any good pictures or organization tips (there goes my OCD again...). But instead my Mom encouraged me to read an article titled "Taming ENVY" by Lesley Dormen. Now if you ever read the Good Advice section of this particular magazine you will find that the subtitle states "staying centered, coping, and living fully." As you know my motto is to live one moment at a time which is a big joke because I am the worst at doing this. The article this month really hit home to me, because I will be the first to admit that I suffer from jealousy and often even worse I covet what I do not have. From clothes, cars, homes, and all the other materialistic items; to far more important things such as a husband, children, a steady career, and a devout relationship with God. (Oh and how can I forget...a cure for eating disorders).
So what does Good Housekeeping suggest? First we should "accept that the feeling of envy is part of being a human." Everyone suffers from it and we must learn to stop punishing ourselves for having these thoughts and "learn to recognize envy's distorted thinking." Easy said than done right? We must realize that we are having envious thoughts and see how unimportant they usually are.
Next step, we must MASTER envious thinking!! This means we must "reconsider our assumptions about what makes us a worthy person." Is buying this new dress really going to benefit me in the long run, or do I want it just because Sally Joe looks so darn cute?? Then we have to use envy as a diagnostic tool- "determining what's missing from our lives by paying attention to what you envy, and whom."
So what did I take away from reading all this??? "Envy is recognizing and accepting our strengths as well as our flaws." I need to appreciate the many gifts that God has provided us all and not get so distracted by the gifts I do not have. Time will tell...God has a plan for both you and me. He will reveal to me in his own time where my Mr. Right is and teach me that having the best outfit with the perfect handbag or having the skinniest body will not fill me with contentment and peace.
Until next time,